“Best Laid Plans”

If I had to help someone understand any lesson in life, the choice for lesson would be simple. You can begin any journey, new chapter, or path with the absolute best intentions and eventually you will find yourself down a road you never thought you would be on. You will mess up, you will make mistakes, you will live with regrets from choices, and you will fail. You start a new chapter after these failures though, one where you have more knowledge of what you want, where you see yourself, and who you are as a person. However, sometimes, once again even those new plans, ideas, and thoughts you have laid out for yourself will sometimes never become your reality. Life has a very interesting way of throwing you curveballs and sometimes your past choices have a way of catching up to you. 

There is a popular theory called the butterfly effect, the theory basically states that if a butterfly flaps its wings on one continent it could cause a tsunami on another continent. In layman’s terms the theory means that a single person’s choice made on a random day of their life could influence their/others lives tremendously down the road. It’s a theory I always found interesting, and I find myself thinking about it at random times during the day. When you first begin to think about it you don’t really think your choices could have that big of an impact on your future. However, when you sit down and really think about it, the deeper the idea gets. When my father was younger, his sister covered him in oil-based paint from head to toe; for someone who does not know anything about art supplies, oil-based paint is incredibly toxic, and my dad almost died. If my dad had died and had never met my mother several years later, I would have never been born – and ultimately would have never been writing this today. The choice from the past that impacted the present now was my grandmother realizing the severity of the situation and getting the paint off my dad as fast as she could (then of course taking him to the doctor). Another choice that impacted right now was when my mom first found out she was pregnant. She and my dad had been trying for a baby for two years when my mom found out she had scare tissue on one of her tubes. She was scheduled for surgery and the day before something told her to call about her results. When she called, the nurse told my mother that she was pregnant. Later, my mom asked the surgeon what would have happened if she had had that surgery and the surgeon said that I would have been killed since she was pregnant. If my mom had not made the choice to call, I would be dead right now.

Every choice has an impact on the future. Regardless of the plans you’ve made, hopes, and dreams you hold, and willpower you must make your life as good as you can – sometimes your choices, even ones from the past that seem un-important can catch up to you. Make your choices wisely. Make your choices line up with what you want for yourself as much as you can. That way (regardless of the outcome) you will know you did your absolute best to get yourself as close to those “best laid plans” you had for yourself. It may not end up like the dream reality you had in mind, but it will be a version of it. A version that has failures, hopes, dreams, regrets, sadness, happiness, and joy all meshed into one perfect story. 

Your story. 

-SincerelyKaley

The Hardest Lesson i have Had To Learn

People are like lumps of coal.

To some, those lumps of coal are just that, lumps of coal. To others, those lumps of coal hold promise. That promise is that with enough time and effort, something valuable comes out of it – a diamond.

People are like lumps of coal.

To some, that promise – regardless of the end result, will never be something they want to put their time or effort into. That metaphorical lump of coal will stay a lump of coal. To others, that promise, irregardless of what it could be, is something they want to put their time and effort into.

People are like lumps of coal.

You and me.

Sometimes in life, we find someone we deem worthy of putting our time and effort into. Hoping that they find our lump of coal worthy of their time and effort too. Sometimes, we get surprised and they do and we end up with beautiful friendships or relationships. However, most times that is not the case at all. Beautiful things, require time; something human beings, for whatever reason, are not willing to put forth.

The hardest lesson I ever had to learn is that you have to be okay with people wanting you to be a lump of coal just as much as you are okay with people who want you to be a diamond. Especially because you cannot have one without the other.

Your life in the grand scheme of this big plan, is not significant at all. If you put your minuscule time frame on the world’s timeframe, you are a dot in the center of something much more massive. The world does not owe you a single thing. This was another hard lesson I had to learn; but this lesson was just as important. It is not up to the world to give you the life you think you deserve, with the people you think you deserve. It is up to you to create that life.

This past year of my life was probably the hardest year I have had in a long time. With more personal growth than most people get their entire lives. I’ve learned more lessons about life this year than most people my age and I’m not saying that makes me wise, but it does mean I have been there. I know the feeling of thinking your life is falling apart and you have nothing left to lose. I know the feeling of perpetually being made to feel like you are just, in fact, a big ass lump of coal; that you have no potential of ever becoming a diamond.

But you do.

I learned (the hardest way possible) that it is not up to other people to define your worth. It is not up to the people around you to remind you that you have reasons your life is great, that your eyes, personality, smile, or whatever else is the reason you are pretty. It is not up to other people to remind you that you are doing the absolute best that you possibly can. Everyone is trying to do that for themselves; in the timeframe of the world, you are responsible for you.

While that thought might seem like a scary one, it’s not. There’s something beautiful in being self-assured, because when it comes down to it, you are responsible for the way you feel about who you are, where you are, and what you are. No one on the planet can take that from you.

Diamonds do not need to be told they are valuable. They sit in display cases waiting for the person who sees their worth. They know that despite being overlooked by many, they are what they are. They understand the time and effort put into creating them and they still shine by themselves, irregardless of how long they spend in that display case.

Diamonds don’t need anyone reminding them of how valuable they are. Neither do you. Be a diamond, shine as bright as you can, and the hell to everything else.

-SincerelyKaley

Kerri

Happy Birthday beautiful!
You are not just my best friend, or my sorority sister, you are my family.
I love you, I’m proud of you, and I hope this birthday is the one that changes everything for you – in the best possible way!

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